It's true I sometimes imagine my life is different. That I'm somebody else. Maybe more than sometimes. But I'm not the only one around who makes stuff up. Adults are always telling you you can be whatever you want when you grow up, but they don't mean it. They don't believe it. They just want you to believe it. It's a fairy tale. Like the tooth fairy. Something they tell you that gets you excited about something not so fantastic. If you think about it, it's pretty gross-your teeth just falling out of your head, leaving bloody sockets for your tongue to poke through. But the story makes it better and the dollar makes it worth it. Then one afternoon you sneak into their bedroom and open the drawer of their nightstand, looking for the DS that they confiscated as punishment for your jumping on the roof of the car again, and you find the little Tupperware full of a dozen jagged pearls, caked brown with your own dried blood, your name written in black Sharpie across a piece of Scotch tape, and you stare at them for a moment in disbelief, wondering if maybe they aren't what you think they are. Maybe they are somebody else's teeth. They can't be yours, because your teeth are in Neverland. Or Toothtopia. Or outer space. Or wherever kleptomaniac fairies live. So you confront them, your lying, scheming parents. Over breakfast, you ask your mom about the tooth fairy: where she lives, what she does during the day, how she manages to collect so many teeth each night, and how come some kids' teeth {like Robbie Dinkler's} are worth five bucks when yours only fetch a dollar apiece. And you see her search for some explanation that is at once both magical and believable, but you know she's just making it up as she goes. It's the same with all grown-ups. They tell you what they think you want to hear and let life tell you the truth later. You can be an astronaut or the president of the United States or second baseman for the White Sox, but you can't really because you hate math, aren't rich, and can't even hit the ball. It's just another fairy tale. So when your next tooth falls out, you figure you'll just ask them if they'd like to keep it or throw it away, because you're not buying it anymore. Or maybe not. Maybe you won't tell them. Maybe you'll still put your teeth under your pillow. Because sometimes it's better to believe in the impossible. To believe you are a secret agent or a private detective or a superhero and not just a kid with freckled cheeks and gangly arms who is too clumsy to leap a tipped-over garbage can in a single bound. Until you are lying in the middle of the sidewalk, with a throbbing ankle and bloody chin, wishing you hadn't even tried.
( John David Anderson )
[ Ms. Bixby's Last Day ]
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