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Book: Aloha from Hell
Quotes of Book: Aloha from Hell
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  1. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    I can't." I scoot forward on the chair and lean close to Carolyn. She freezes, trying to keep her eyes from meeting mine. "Or maybe you're not Hunter's friend and you gave him a hot shot. Is that what you did, Carolyn? Did someone give you a special dose of Akira just for Hunter?" Stop digging, boys, we struck oil. Carolyn's brain is still humming like a tuning fork, but at least she's focused on something now. It's there in her eyes. She's beating herself silly trying to make all the contradictions and lies in her life add up to something sane. She really believes she's Hunter's friend, but the meth fog she lives in lets her justify giving Hunter drugs she knew were bad because someone up the food chain promised her more drugs or more money or the chance to settle a long-standing debt. Whatever her reasons, she feels guilty as hell. The addict self-pity tears start pumping out of her red and bruised eyes. I want to smack her to see if it snaps her brain back into gear, but I just pat her lightly on the shoulder. I keep my voice low, like I'm speaking to a child.
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  2. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    It seemed to be going well. You see, a Qliphoth can only possess an imperfect and impure body, one that's sinned. Of course, that describes all humans except maybe for the saints. When I eat a possessed person's sins, their body returns to a pure and holy state. With nowhere left to hide, the Qliphoth is ejected like someone spitting out a watermelon seed.
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  3. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    If you're in the exorcism business, you must know a lot about demons." "Qliphoth," he says. "What?" "It's the proper word for what you call a demon. A demon is a bogeyman, an irrational entity representing fear in the collective unconscious. The Qliphoth are the castoffs of a greater entity. The old gods. They're dumb and their lack of intelligence makes them pure evil." "Okay, Daniel Webster. What happened at the exorcism?" Traven takes a breath and stares at his hands for a minute. "You should know that I don't follow the Church's standard exorcism rites. For instance, I seldom speak Latin. If Qliphoth really are lost fragments of the Angra Om Ya, the older dark gods, they're part of creatures millions of years old. Why would Latin have any effect on them?
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  4. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Lucifer was his name in Perdition. In Heaven, he's Samael.
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  5. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Fuck this place and fuck your games. This is where you first failed us. You gave us minds and told us not to think. You gave us curiosity and put a booby-trapped tree right in front of us. You gave us sex and told us not to do it. You played three-card monte with our souls from day one, and when we couldn't find the queen, you sent us to Hell to be tortured for eternity. That was your great plan for humanity? Whatever
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  6. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    You murder someone at the Ice Capades and the place goes apeshit. You blow someone's head off in a war zone, people step over the body and have a snack.
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  7. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    The lucky among us might get the same deal as Dysmas. Dysmas was one of the thieves crucified next to Christ. When he asked for forgiveness, Christ said, 'Today you will be with me in paradise.' " Candy
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  8. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Every day I walk down Hollywood Boulevard and see civilians making themselves crazy worrying about the meetings they're late for or did they put the rent check in the mail or is their ass starting to sag and I think, "I've seen the creaky clockwork that turns the stars and planets. I've gotten drunk with the devil and body-slammed angels. I've seen the Room of Thirteen Doors at the center of the universe. I know the taste of my own blood as well as you know your favorite wine. I've seen so much more than you'll ever see." And then it hits me like a runaway semi. I don't know anything that matters.
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  9. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Make her stop. I'm hungover and she has a robot. It's not fair." "Life is fair only in the grave and in the bedroom. This, you will notice, is neither.
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  10. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Calm down. Deep breaths. Go to your happy place. Oh, wait. I don't have one.
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  11. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    Kids need their minds blown every now and then. It'll keep them from thinking that managing a McDonald's is the most they can hope for.
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  12. Richard Kadrey _ Aloha from Hell

    When you're born in a burning house, you think the whole world is on fire. But it's not.
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